Syria: Suprise! You're in the army now!

We are delighted to inform that your name was luckily selected for an all-expenses-paid vacation to your favorite combat zone. Ideal for some stress release, your all-inclusive trip includes athletic activities like target shooting and trench building, a chance to discover the hidden hotspots off the Syrian tourist trail and a detox health menu of canned goods to flush all toxins from your system and replace them with some new ones.